this set of novellas should be used sparingly. to punish some of our nation's worst criminals, or on people who think buttered popcorn jellybeans are this set of novellas should be used sparingly. to punish some of our nation's worst criminals, or on people who think buttered popcorn jellybeans are good.
i'm aware that that's a redundant statement.
every ali hazelwood book is - small girl big man - small girl quirky, big man serious - big man pining, small girl unaware - big man f*cks small girl without a condom
this girl is said once to be tall, but she is also said to be small-boned (?) so it's the same as ever.
also the pervasiveness of the "i'm on the pill" / "can i come inside you" conversation within these 3 novellas is disturbing. i really really really would prefer not to know strangers' (read: authors') sexual kinks, but you read the identical sex scenes in this AND the love hypothesis AND love on the brain AND the first novella AND the second novella and do the math.
i unfortunately already have. i have done not only the math, but near identical rant reviews four times. (i am debating rereading the love hypothesis, probably discovering i now hate it, and making it an even five.)
feel free to read any of those to reconstruct my suffering alongside me.
bottom line: ALI HAZELWOOD WHAT HAVE YOU MADE ME BECOME.
---------------- currently-reading updates
i'm just hate reading at this point
---------------- tbr review
what do i have to do to get more ali hazelwood. i'll do anything.
as long as anything doesn't include sending an email or trying very hard. i'm only human
Merged review:
this set of novellas should be used sparingly. to punish some of our nation's worst criminals, or on people who think buttered popcorn jellybeans are good.
i'm aware that that's a redundant statement.
every ali hazelwood book is - small girl big man - small girl quirky, big man serious - big man pining, small girl unaware - big man f*cks small girl without a condom
this girl is said once to be tall, but she is also said to be small-boned (?) so it's the same as ever.
also the pervasiveness of the "i'm on the pill" / "can i come inside you" conversation within these 3 novellas is disturbing. i really really really would prefer not to know strangers' (read: authors') sexual kinks, but you read the identical sex scenes in this AND the love hypothesis AND love on the brain AND the first novella AND the second novella and do the math.
i unfortunately already have. i have done not only the math, but near identical rant reviews four times. (i am debating rereading the love hypothesis, probably discovering i now hate it, and making it an even five.)
feel free to read any of those to reconstruct my suffering alongside me.
bottom line: ALI HAZELWOOD WHAT HAVE YOU MADE ME BECOME.
---------------- currently-reading updates
i'm just hate reading at this point
---------------- tbr review
what do i have to do to get more ali hazelwood. i'll do anything.
as long as anything doesn't include sending an email or trying very hard. i'm only human...more
they already found the cure for loneliness. it's called "Reading + An Active Imagination"
...anyway.
like many things, this had a lot of great ideas andthey already found the cure for loneliness. it's called "Reading + An Active Imagination"
...anyway.
like many things, this had a lot of great ideas and fell flat on the execution. it never really works for me when the first 200+ pages of a book are exposition and then the climax hits with 40 pages to go, and this was left feeling sloppy and rushed. this book felt like it had the concept it wanted, and the ending it knew it wanted to get to, and then it just kind of rambled in between.
reading the epilogue and finding our protagonist transformed, (view spoiler)[armed with friendships with barely mentioned characters, a terminated relationship that had showed no signs of being stopped, and a totally different career path (hide spoiler)] with none of the development it would have taken to get there, felt frustrating. also i just don't know why this book felt like it needed a love triangle, or why the roommate had to be constantly eating and made fun of for that, or (and maybe it's just me) why this had to do that sci-fi thing where you just capitalize common phrases to indicate they have taken on some sort of dystopian brand.
oh well.
bottom line: this was really promising, and i really enjoyed moments of it, but its last page and its middle pages threw me off.
short magical realism story collection about the beauty of being alive...this book is for me, specifically.
mini reviews for each story:
THE RETURN TO Mshort magical realism story collection about the beauty of being alive...this book is for me, specifically.
mini reviews for each story:
THE RETURN TO MONSTERLAND pretty traditional parent abandonment story, except what if your mom left your family to pursue the scientific study of godzilla. rating: 3
PLACENTOPHAGY this was just about the opposite of the last one: short and extremely unique. rating: 3.5
ROKUROKUBI if i were a demon and my only power was having a stretchy neck i would be so disappointed. all this guy does with his power is steal underwear and get cheated on by his wife. rating: 3
GIRL ZERO finally, some good f*cking food (if gordon ramsay was talking about a unique, emotional story that reminded me of why i loved the author's other work).
even if it lost it along the way. rating: 3.5
PEACH BOY i do love a fairytale vibe.
maybe now is a good time to point out that there are fun one-page interludes between these stories, which i enjoy even though they're messing with my format. rating: 3.5
THE INN OF THE DEAD'S ORIENTATION FOR BEING A JAPANESE GHOST the concept: :) the execution: ... :/
(this is the reaction of when you really want to like something but it's kinda just trying too hard and you have to cringe a bit.) rating: 3
THE PASSAGE OF TIME IN THE ABYSS contents aside, we've got some great titles here.
sorry but if i were taking my grandchildren on a fishing trip, i simply wouldn't go out when a huge storm was coming "because the catch is better before the storm." i'm just kind of built different like that. rating: 2.5
THE REST OF THE WAY sad one. but not sad enough? does that make sense? more depressing than emotional. rating: 2.5
WHERE WE GO WHEN ALL WE WERE IS GONE title story title story title story!
if you asked me to guess what this was about i probably would have had to go for a while before getting to "dystopian style dance party." rating: 3
THE SNOW BABY okay. rating: 2.5
HEADWATER LLC no matter how many interchangeable upsetting stories there are about human greed destroying nature, they will always be depressing. rating: 3.5
KENTA'S POSTHUMOUS CHRYSANTHEMUM i mean, the title is very literal. rating: 2.5
OVERALL i'm so disappointed by this book as to be actually confused. the author's novel is so emotional, so evocative, so powerfully rendered that each of its many perspectives feel unforgettable. with a few exceptions, this was...weird? trying to shock the reader? totally emotionless? shallow plays at feeling? i have no idea how the same person could have written both.
this book is not bad, but compared to the author's other work...sheesh. rating: 2.5...more
(this comes to mind because this book explores the line between dream and reality, and not because i'm just thinking about childrenlife is but a dream
(this comes to mind because this book explores the line between dream and reality, and not because i'm just thinking about children's songs)
(anyway)
there were moments this was truly interesting, but for the most part it was overambitious and seemed to find the huge number of symbols, motifs, themes, and Various Things Of Literary Significance it had saddled itself with unwieldy. it didn't nail the dismount, so to speak.
this was VERY DIFFERENT from a good girl's guide to murder.
alternate title proposal: a mean girl's guide to family drama and bullying the people arouthis was VERY DIFFERENT from a good girl's guide to murder.
alternate title proposal: a mean girl's guide to family drama and bullying the people around her.
it was a lot more dramatic, a lot less realistic, and a lot more filled with secrets and cringy moments of the meanest teenage girl you've ever encountered in your fiction-reading life making adults cry. which is...not my usual demographic.
the last third or so was a lot more enjoyable of a reading experience, but it wasn't a satisfying conclusion. instead it was really info dumpy, very unrealistic feeling.
if a good girl's guide to murder is like the first few seasons of pretty little liars, this is like the last few. unrealistic, confusing, and vaguely alarming.
but still surprising and weirdly fun.
bottom line: the real plot twist is how much i didn't expect about this book.
2.5
------------------ tbr review
a good reader's guide to adding too many books to her tbr
the important thing to know about this is it's a bad book written by a good writer. the characters: flimsy. their rellike a reverse irish exit?
anyway.
the important thing to know about this is it's a bad book written by a good writer. the characters: flimsy. their relationships: inexplicable. the plot: filled with years-long gaps to the point of being incomprehensible.
but the writing itself? the dialogue? the little jokes? excellent.
the other thing to know is that it is very weird. it's a white woman who was once a backup singer in a Black group and can't get over it. that's not much to carry us through 250 pages and it never feels any more normal.
maybe it was a different time.
bottom line: sometimes books are forgotten for a reason.
short stories about "slightly off-kilter worlds tucked away in the corners of everyday life"??? gimme
mini reviews for each story because i'm pretendinshort stories about "slightly off-kilter worlds tucked away in the corners of everyday life"??? gimme
mini reviews for each story because i'm pretending i have my life together:
TABLE FOR ONE sometimes i think that the title story being the very first story in the collection is not a good sign. this is a fun one about people who take lessons on how to eat alone, and it made me want korean bbq very badly. rating: 3.5
SWEET ESCAPE this story, which is about people eating popsicles and becoming obsessed with preventing bedbugs, includes a scene in which everyone in an apartment building smells cilantro — which apparently smells like bedbugs? — and is disgusted.
as a cilantro fan, i can't abide this insect-based propaganda. that's not the reason this story isn't great, but it didn't help. rating: 2.5
INVADER GRAPHIC i kinda wish i was a kleptomaniac. i love free stuff so i wish i didn't have my rule abiding self holding me back. plus i always made my sims have that trait since i thought it was fun to have them bring little presents back from work.
anyway. this is a story about a woman who works from a department store bathroom every day. rating: 3.5
HYEONMONG PARK'S HOUSE OF DREAMS it turns out if dreams were for sale it would mostly just be a capitalist contest to corner the industry.
which i guess is not that surprising. but it's also not all that fun to read about. rating: 3
ROADKILL there should be another word for "kafkaesque" meaning trying really hard to be. rating: 3
TIME CAPSULE 1994 i'm going to be real with you: i don't know what this one means. rating: 3
ICELAND this is a story about the category of "iceland person," which is a person who is obsessed with the concept of visiting and/or living in iceland.
we all know at least one. rating: 3
PIERCING they say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. but this is MY goodreads account, so i get to say this was disgusting and stupid and i hated it so much. rating: 1
DON'T CRY, HONGDO this one was just about a kid who has to eat organic and has a crush on her teacher. maybe i'm just sensitive because being forced to eat organic was my trial in youth (i still remember the day they took the slushy machine out of the cafeteria...), but this one didn't quite click. rating: 2.5
OVERALL i honestly love when story collections are united by a theme, and it's something that if i were evil dictator of the world i would make a requirement. unfortunately these felt a bit elementary, and a little off, like they needed another polish before being sent out into the world. rating: 2.5
i don't think i've ever read a novella addition to a series and been like "yeah, that was necessary." but that doesn't stop me from trying.
this was noi don't think i've ever read a novella addition to a series and been like "yeah, that was necessary." but that doesn't stop me from trying.
this was no exception though.
it only provided insight into how pip decided to do her senior capstone project in the first book, which is possibly the least interesting thing it could possibly be about while still technically being in any way related to the actual mystery.
it also exclusively follows the plotline of a murder mystery dinner type board game, which are not famous for being interesting and filled with shock value.
it was a quick read and not terrible but that's the nicest i can be.
bottom line: if you're like, "i'd read holly jackson writing about literally anything," this is the novella for you....more
but my favorite part of this was the food descriptions.
unfortunately, the rest was extremely repetitiveof course i want to read about magic fox girls.
but my favorite part of this was the food descriptions.
unfortunately, the rest was extremely repetitive. we have two perspectives, one of a fox girl and the other of an aging investigator, both of which sound interesting and aren't. each perspective just follows its respective protagonist as they go from the same place to the next, looking for the same thing, unchanging in themselves or in the plot. i waited for this book to pick up and it never did.
the writing was also strange—a lot of moments where something would happen, and then it would be rhetorically referred to as if it didn't. a character spots another character, and then 2 sentences later, when he starts speaking to her: "he'd managed to find me after all." like, no, he just saw you. we just talked about that. "she'd used her patron's name, hoping it would open doors. which it had." okay, why did we have to say that then. it resulted in me going back and rereading a lot of paragraphs and getting frustrated.
the ending and romance came out of nowhere, after hundreds of pages of sexual harassment, but there were parts of this i enjoyed.
i just wish there were more of them.
bottom line: more foxes, more food, less weirdness.
(2.5 / thanks to the publisher for the e-arc)...more
the background: i have decided to become a genius.
to accomplish this, i'm going to work my way through the collecmy becoming-a-genius project, part 28!
the background: i have decided to become a genius.
to accomplish this, i'm going to work my way through the collected stories of various authors, reading + reviewing 1 story every day until i get bored / lose every single follower / am struck down by a vengeful deity.
we're approaching the third anniversary of my commencement of this project and also i have not undertaken an installment of it in several months, so this is an exciting event.
DAY 1: JOHN REDDING GOES TO SEA this had the unique unbelievably depressing / know-it-all combo of an old-timey fairytale. i for one think unrelated tragedy cannot be blamed on some guy's wife being like "if you wanted to leave and travel everywhere solo style you probably shouldn't have married me." rating: 2.5
DAY 2: THE CONVERSION OF SAM eek. another very moral and didactic one.
which i guess i should have guessed from the title. rating: 2.5
DAY 3: A BIT OF OUR HARLEM feeling: hopeful. this story is all of 2 pages long and it seems like there's no way there'll be time to preach a lesson at all.
never mind. it managed. rating: 3
DAY 4: DRENCHED IN LIGHT this one was...interesting.
i love a free-spirited lowkey annoying kid as much as the next person but i don't know about the happily ever after being a potential adoption from a significantly more annoying white family. rating: 3
DAY 5: SPUNK if we have to get all Big Lesson, this is the way to do it. i'll take murderous ghosts and vengeance and gossip any day. rating: 3.5
DAY 6: MAGNOLIA FLOWER i have to say this is just not the collection i expected after their eyes were watching god at all.
this one is giving disney princess. rating: 3
DAY 7: BLACK DEATH now THIS is what i'm talking about. if we're going to cast aspersions on those who sin, at least give me some sort of dark magic sorcerer to do the punishing! rating: 3.5
DAY 8: THE BONE OF CONTENTION this one was amusing. i will give it that. rating: 3.5
DAY 9: MUTTSY well this one was just depressing. the conversion of sam without the conversion part. rating: 2.5
DAY 10: SWEAT this story contains the insult "she don't look like a thing but a hunk of liver with hair on it," and therefore i stand with it in support for all my days.
it's also a very well-deserved act of Womanly Vengeance, so that helps. rating: 3.5
DAY 11: UNDER THE BRIDGE the lesson of this story is that if you marry a much younger woman your hot son gets to fall in love with her and you can't even get that mad. rating: 3
DAY 12: POSSUM OR PIG? not a question i've had occasion to ask very often.
call me crazy, but i am not loving these stories with strange morals involving slaves "wronging" white people. stealing a pig seems pretty low on the crime scale when compared with enslavement. rating: 2.5
DAY 13: THE EATONVILLE ANTHOLOGY this was the florida equivalent of olive kitteredge. just a bunch of sad people living unhappy lives in a small town. enjoy. rating: 3
DAY 14: THE BOOK OF HARLEM a lot of these stories have been biblical in a variety of ways.
this one chose "language and format." rating: 3
DAY 15: THE BOOK OF HARLEM oh good. it's almost exactly the same as yesterday. down to the title. rating: 2.5
DAY 16: THE BACK ROOM fun little dorian gray situation here. if dorian gray could be told in 10 pages or less. rating: 3
DAY 17: MONKEY JUNK we're having fun with biblical formatting again. rating: 3
DAY 18: THE COUNTRY IN THE WOMAN i do think that the appropriate response to seeing your husband on his fourth side piece is to slow-walk toward them with an axe like a horror movie serial killer.
the punishment fits the crime. rating: 3.5
DAY 19: THE GILDED SIX-BITS another moral. gosh these are depressing. rating: 3
DAY 20: SHE-ROCK biblical formatting alert.
this contains a truly astonishing phrase (a beverage called "coon-dick") which i was so titillated by i immediately had to google and the only results i received were about raccoon penises. so now i feel like i got pranked by zora neale hurston on a decades-long delay. rating: 2.5
DAY 21: THE FIRE AND THE CLOUD i have to say, i thought a story about a talking lizard would have a little more going on. rating: 2.5
OVERALL i was really excited to read this collection, but unfortunately not many of these felt like they came from the author of their eyes were watching god, a book i loved. these stories had sparkling moments of brilliance and ones i truly enjoyed and some that just weren't my cup of tea. it was a lot more moralistic than i expected.
it's neither a good nor bad book for me, and therefore in the exact middle it goes. rating: 2.5...more
honestly, reading this book prompted a lot of shouldn't haves.
cursed bunny is strange and fascinating and unpredia utopia? for me? you shouldn't have.
honestly, reading this book prompted a lot of shouldn't haves.
cursed bunny is strange and fascinating and unpredictable. this, by the same author, led me to expect a bizarre good time, but all of these stories — while striving for weird on the surface — were one-note and easy to anticipate.
some of them were in space, some were in the future, some were...well actually most of them were in one or the other, but all of them were about technology and society, and they had simple things to say.
after two story collections from chung, i'd be interested in a novel.
it's no shock that i did like the bookshop part. and it's probably not that much of a shock thahad me at days in a bookshop.
lost me at the other days.
it's no shock that i did like the bookshop part. and it's probably not that much of a shock that it was the entire second half of the book, which occurred after our protagonist was no longer an employee of or even a real visitor to the bookshop, focusing on the reasons why her aunt had left her father many years before, that i didn't care for as much.
and to be fair, how could i have seen that one coming? i would have seemed diagnosable if i predicted that from this title / cover combo.
it's not just that it existed at all, although anything that pulls me away from a bookshop whether literally or fictionally is my enemy. it's more that the whole plotline felt shallow and unwieldy, given too much page time and still somehow not enough exploration.
i never have that problem when i'm reading about reading.
bottom line: books about books - yes. books about inaccurate and weird emotional subplots - maybe not.
i would follow the lines of a family for 300, 400, 500 pages. i've followed them for 800+! 240 pagei love family dramas.
this one just felt too short.
i would follow the lines of a family for 300, 400, 500 pages. i've followed them for 800+! 240 pages doesn't feel like enough to see the full dimensions of their dynamics, the traces of family they carry, to develop full characters i'll remember forever.
while there are moments of this that struck me, in truth there just weren't enough moments for this to stick with me.
a lolita retelling about a white man who only dates asian women...genius.
i badly wanted to like this book, because that's brilliant and because i bouga lolita retelling about a white man who only dates asian women...genius.
i badly wanted to like this book, because that's brilliant and because i bought it in the world's most beautiful bookstore and because it's a posthumous release edited by the author's daughter, but it fell flat for me.
it starts off kinetically, with three perspectives and a kidnapping and a secret, but this book was unfinished, mid-revision when the author abandoned it, and you can tell. it follows daniel, a violinist and asian fetishist; kyoko, the daughter of the woman he spurned; and alma, the love of his life. its first pages see two characters contemplating suicide and the third taking up a murder plot.
alma and kyoko are at first outrageously interesting, both as characters and for what they represent, but kyoko falls out of the narrative and alma's ending is so unsatisfying. (i'd be remiss not to mention that the way kyoko's boyfriend, kornell, a black man, speaks and is characterized did not sit right with me.)
this has SO MUCH to say about asian fetishization, which as a white woman marrying an asian man i consider often from a different perspective, but it doesn't want to stick to its guns. it lets daniel weasel his way out of any broader understanding of the phenomenon, and redeem himself in a way that feels icky.
i'll definitely be looking into this author's other work, because my real complaint about this book is that it didn't feel cohesive or complete. and it wasn't!
bottom line: this had so much going for it, but not enough....more
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