Sign in with Facebook
B.P. Marshall's Reviews > Fearless: Finding the Power to Thrive
Fearless: Finding the Power to Thrive
by
by
[My Review for Tasmanian Times]
There are those rare people who have been through hell, and walk out of the flames carrying buckets of water for those still burning. Jelena Dokic’ second book, Fearless, goes beyond her early years (told in her first, Unbreakable), to find a path forward, not just for herself but for everyone struggling with abuse. This engaging book is about more than survival against the odds, it’s about her efforts to thrive and to help others.
Her journey through hell isn’t over, and in some senses never will be, but Dokic is doggedly determined. She’s also sufficiently self-aware to know that healing, like grieving, is an endless process.
‘I don’t think I will ever get over what I have been through. But I won’t be defined by it; I am now determined to grow from it and to be stronger and wiser because of it.’
Though she touches on some of the same ground as Unbreakable - her life as a refugee, of childhood poverty, of being an outsider as a young Eastern European in a predominantly Anglo-Australia, her passion for tennis, and of the wounds inflicted by her notorious and abusive father, Dokic’ focus here is on helping those still in the hell of others’ making.
Fearless, co-written by colleague and friend, Jessica Halloran, uses plain and unpretentious prose that articulates clearly Dokic’ hurts, her shame, her mental illness, and what helped her stand back from that final act of hopelessness, suicide.
‘I wanted my pain to be over.’
On her journey, though doing her best to do right by everyone, including her abusive father, Dokic has received the vilest of online trolling, body-shaming and sneering media abuse. Though living in fear, it’s her honesty, courage and character which have crucially won her friends that count – who offer and deliver encouragement and genuine support. While media have often failed Dokic, and many other high-profile women in sports, she credits positive changes. There is, perhaps arguably, a growing awareness within media of the duties and responsibilities which journalists and editors share beyond generating click-bait.
The institutions of sport too have played a role in enabling abuse of young players, mostly young women, but they too are realising what they must do to protect and defend children from those who would exploit them, whether they be coaches, fellow players or family. Her advice?
‘Don’t dismiss, silence or disrespect women in any field or any part of everyday life.’
Dokic never really vents at those who have attacked her, only reprimanding them on their moral failure - unkindness. The hate-generating trolls and media grifters whom she refrains from calling out directly may deserve to be publicly named and shamed, but Dokic takes the high road. This book isn’t revenge. It isn’t for her, it’s for others like her. Venting at her abusers would only generate hate, not healing.
Dokic is still, daily, binding her mental and physical wounds, holding her head high to offer of herself, quietly and bravely speaking truth to power, and giving hope. For Dokic, all that really counts in a person is being honest and kind to oneself and others.
‘Kindness is giving someone else your strength, your smile, your generosity.’
We need to listen to conversations about mental health and recognise the strongest of us may sometimes need professional support, medications or just to be heard. We need to know that we aren’t defined by our mental illness. We need to recognise that speaking of our vulnerabilities gives us strength, even the strength to hope.
‘Speaking up creates change, saves lives.’
As they say, strong women stand up for themselves, stronger women stand up for others – Fearless is Dokic revealing every last vulnerability to do just that.
Game, set and match, Jelena Dokic.
Lifeline: for anyone experiencing a personal crisis – 13 11 14 – lifeline.org.au
Suicidecallbackservice.org.au – counselling for people affected by suicide
1800RESPECT – 1800 737 732 – domestic violence or childhood abuse counselling.
Kids helpline – 1800 551 800
Beyond Blue – 1300 22 4636 – for advice on anxiety, depression or suicidal thoughts.
Headspace.org.au – for young people struggling with mental health
There are those rare people who have been through hell, and walk out of the flames carrying buckets of water for those still burning. Jelena Dokic’ second book, Fearless, goes beyond her early years (told in her first, Unbreakable), to find a path forward, not just for herself but for everyone struggling with abuse. This engaging book is about more than survival against the odds, it’s about her efforts to thrive and to help others.
Her journey through hell isn’t over, and in some senses never will be, but Dokic is doggedly determined. She’s also sufficiently self-aware to know that healing, like grieving, is an endless process.
‘I don’t think I will ever get over what I have been through. But I won’t be defined by it; I am now determined to grow from it and to be stronger and wiser because of it.’
Though she touches on some of the same ground as Unbreakable - her life as a refugee, of childhood poverty, of being an outsider as a young Eastern European in a predominantly Anglo-Australia, her passion for tennis, and of the wounds inflicted by her notorious and abusive father, Dokic’ focus here is on helping those still in the hell of others’ making.
Fearless, co-written by colleague and friend, Jessica Halloran, uses plain and unpretentious prose that articulates clearly Dokic’ hurts, her shame, her mental illness, and what helped her stand back from that final act of hopelessness, suicide.
‘I wanted my pain to be over.’
On her journey, though doing her best to do right by everyone, including her abusive father, Dokic has received the vilest of online trolling, body-shaming and sneering media abuse. Though living in fear, it’s her honesty, courage and character which have crucially won her friends that count – who offer and deliver encouragement and genuine support. While media have often failed Dokic, and many other high-profile women in sports, she credits positive changes. There is, perhaps arguably, a growing awareness within media of the duties and responsibilities which journalists and editors share beyond generating click-bait.
The institutions of sport too have played a role in enabling abuse of young players, mostly young women, but they too are realising what they must do to protect and defend children from those who would exploit them, whether they be coaches, fellow players or family. Her advice?
‘Don’t dismiss, silence or disrespect women in any field or any part of everyday life.’
Dokic never really vents at those who have attacked her, only reprimanding them on their moral failure - unkindness. The hate-generating trolls and media grifters whom she refrains from calling out directly may deserve to be publicly named and shamed, but Dokic takes the high road. This book isn’t revenge. It isn’t for her, it’s for others like her. Venting at her abusers would only generate hate, not healing.
Dokic is still, daily, binding her mental and physical wounds, holding her head high to offer of herself, quietly and bravely speaking truth to power, and giving hope. For Dokic, all that really counts in a person is being honest and kind to oneself and others.
‘Kindness is giving someone else your strength, your smile, your generosity.’
We need to listen to conversations about mental health and recognise the strongest of us may sometimes need professional support, medications or just to be heard. We need to know that we aren’t defined by our mental illness. We need to recognise that speaking of our vulnerabilities gives us strength, even the strength to hope.
‘Speaking up creates change, saves lives.’
As they say, strong women stand up for themselves, stronger women stand up for others – Fearless is Dokic revealing every last vulnerability to do just that.
Game, set and match, Jelena Dokic.
Lifeline: for anyone experiencing a personal crisis – 13 11 14 – lifeline.org.au
Suicidecallbackservice.org.au – counselling for people affected by suicide
1800RESPECT – 1800 737 732 – domestic violence or childhood abuse counselling.
Kids helpline – 1800 551 800
Beyond Blue – 1300 22 4636 – for advice on anxiety, depression or suicidal thoughts.
Headspace.org.au – for young people struggling with mental health
Sign into Goodreads to see if any of your friends have read
Fearless.
Sign In »
Reading Progress
Finished Reading
March 12, 2024
– Shelved
