Author! Author! (1982)
Al Pacino: Ivan Travalian
Photos
Quotes
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Travalian : No ex-husband of Gloria's ever has to apologize to me about anything. We're like a little club.
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Ivan : I have done many terrible things in my life but I have never put another man's wife in my bed.
Larry Kotzwinkle : Wasn't she married to that Spanish painter when you slept with her?
Ivan : Don't prove me wrong, Larry, I hate it when I'm proven wrong.
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Gloria Travalian : Ivan, I'm not leaving you for another man.
Travalian : Larry Kotzwinkle's not a man, he's a duck.
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Gloria Travalian : Larry is a wonderful man.
Ivan : I'm thrilled to hear this.
Gloria Travalian : Larry is a wonderful man, but he's not you.
Ivan : That's what I figured when he scratched his leg and I felt nothing. 'This man is not me.'
Gloria Travalian : [Snobs] How can you joke at a time like this?
Ivan : I joke, You snob. What difference does it make? We're both miserable.
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Ivan : GLORIA! GLOOOORIAAAAA!
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Drug Dealer : You shove, shoot it, snort it. I gotta sell it.
Travalian : Look, my kid's in the business.
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Ivan : Okay, Gloria!
[picking up a table]
Ivan : Sit down or I'm gonna hit you with this chair!
Gloria Travalian : That's a table.
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Gloria Travalian : Oh, Ivan. I'm hurting you.
Ivan : That's the kindest thing you've said to me in six months, "Oh, Ivan, I'm hurting you."
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Seth Shapiro : [helping her on with her fur coat] What a fabulous look! What's it called?
Alice : Peach Divine.
Seth Shapiro : Is it edible?
Alice : Do you think he's bi-sexual?
Ivan : He never looked at a woman in his life!
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Gloria Travalian : You're at the goddamn typewriter 14 hours a day...
Ivan : I'M AT THE GODDAMN TYPEWRITER, GLORIA... BECAUSE I'M A GODDAMN WRITER, GLORIA!
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Gloria Travalian : Larry and I are moving to the Good Harbor Beach Inn in Massachusetts. We've agreed to live there for a three month trial period and if it works, we'll be married on Larry's birthday in March.
Ivan : Okay... okay-I guess I'll be heading back to rehearsal. Enough taking time off from work for fun, huh? You can keep the night table, Gloria.
Gloria Travalian : No...
Ivan : I just wanna say that you are the craziest person I've met since the guy blocking the bank door. He was wearing a Superman cape and pantyhose... crazier than you... maybe not.
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Ivan : Class dismissed!